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Slots Simplified, Part 2
by Mark Pilarski

Last week, Sherry, from Buffalo, requested some tips on the most popular of all casino games, SLOTS. Here is a continuation of that column.


9. Before you walk away from a machine, don't forget to press the cash-out button. Millions are lost each year by gamblers forgetting their winnings (stored credits).

10. It is your responsibility if destiny favors you that you receive full payment when hitting a jackpot. Even with some relatively small jackpots, if the slot is short coins in the hopper, you'll receive only a partial cash payment in the tray, with the balance to be paid by a slot attendant. If you were to insert more coins and pull the handle, say bye-bye to the remainder of your jackpot.

11. Read all the posted material on a slot machine. It is your responsibility to fully understand all printed information concerning the number of coins to insert, lines needed to be lit, prizes or awards. In most cases, when someone calls a slot attendant over and complains the machine "just ripped me off," that individual generally didn't read the pay schedule correctly.

12. When you insert coins, don't assume all the tokens register before you pull the handle. Played five but only four recorded? SORRY. You'll get a sympathetic pat on the back from the casino, but no money.

13. I recommend avoiding machines that use video representations of symbols. With these slots, there is absolutely no way to figure out what the payoff percentage of that machine is. For all you know, your true chances of hitting a major jackpot could be 2,097,152 to 1.

14. Most casinos will hold a slot for you while you go to the restroom, take a short break, or even go on a buffet run. Just ask a slot supervisor to reserve your machine and give a specific time when you'll return.

15. Don't chain yourself to a cold machine, even if it's your favorite. Why? Because the longer you stay on any slot, the more time the machine's built-in mathematical advantage has to work you over. This is how casinos build mega-resorts. Time always working on their side and a mathematical edge on each and every slot.

16. Just because you're only playing slots you still need to set a loss limit on your bankroll for both your trip and each individual gaming session. Divvy up your wad per playing session, discipline yourself, and stick to it.

17. I'll come clean here. I don't play slots. But as a local in a casino town, I know where the locals who do play find the most cluck-for-the-buck. Simply put, locals don't play dog machines. So when searching for high payback machines, ask a few employees where the locals find the best slot value. Even if they're not slot players themselves, they at least know where their friends like to play.

18. Leave both your credit and bank teller cards at home so you will not be tempted with the easy convenience of getting cash. Also, allow me to take the obvious one step further. Only bet what you can afford to lose.

Finally, going to slot heaven-Las Vegas? Your best return in Las Vegas, and the country for that matter, are in the casinos downtown. Average return on quarter machines: 95.5 percent. That almost makes it a decent wager. Good luck, Sherry.

Before I Shuffle: For those of you who missed Part 1 of Simplified Slots, you can locate it at my Web Site (http://winner.com) under archived columns, or by sending a self-addressed stamped envelope to the address below. I'll mail Part 1 out to you, tout de suite. (I asked my wife to give me another word for pronto.)
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